Big Survey: Jewelers Actually Heard These Weird Complaints from Their Customers

YOU ARE EXPECTED to be everything under the sun, from a plumber (“I could not solder a faucet”) to a caterer (“We did not offer them a sandwich”) to a dentist (“I wouldn’t clean the lady’s gold teeth while they were in her mouth.”) You may feel you just can’t win. Still, somehow, you persevere! Read on for more “weird” complaints.

• We polished a wide wedding band to new condition after sizing it and the customer was furious. She said she didn’t want to appear newlywed.
• I wouldn’t clean this lady’s gold teeth while they were in her mouth.
• We didn’t offer them a sandwich.
• Customer: “What? I ran over it with my car and it’s not covered by your warranty?
  Don’t you stand behind your product?”
• I could not solder a faucet.
• A customer complained that her diamond had not grown over the five years she bought it from me.
• Customer: “The electricity in my body stops watches I buy from you. You must do something to them.”
• She didn’t like the reflection that her ideal-cut diamond created on her car dashboard as she drove on a sunny day.
• A lady brought in a watch for a battery replacement that was wrapped in a tissue and placed inside a small sandwich bag. When she returned for the watch, she complained that we had thrown away her Ziploc bag. We offered her a smaller bag that we put extra links in but she refused. She wanted her Ziploc bag back.
• That we could custom make body jewelry but would not perform the installation.
• “You’re too happy.”
• It’s easier to get in touch with the Pope.
• You switched my diamond for a better one.
• Why can’t I dirt bike with my platinum diamond engagement ring on?
• I was scary looking.
• I wouldn’t honor a lifetime battery for a woman who brought in her deceased husband’s watch. I said it’s a lifetime guarantee of the watch or owner, whichever comes first.
• I did not put radioactive material back on the watch.
• My honesty makes it hard for them to spend money in my store because I don’t upsell them.
• That I couldn’t appraise a crown. (The kind that’s worn on a head).
• Customer wanted to know if we “price-matched.” She was looking at a mini-flashlight. Price was $4.95.
• There’s a charge?
• Earrings exploded.
• It’s too sparkly and makes the other jewelry look bad in comparison.
• Customer: I need to exchange this ring bought five years ago but I want an identical one. Me: Why? Customer: Because my priest says it’s cursed so I want the same style, same price, but different diamonds and gold.
• It wasn’t free for old people.