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True Tales

If One Sister Won’t Marry Him, Maybe the Other Will

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A fellow came in to return an engagement ring he had just purchased a few weeks earlier. He said his fiancée had refused it, so it was never worn or sized. I offered him a credit and he asked if he could exchange it for yet another new engagement ring. I thought he was joking so I smiled, but noticing him looking in the showcase, I said sure, why not. He mentioned that this new(er) engagement ring was to be intended for his ex-almost-fiancée’s younger sister. “Are you kidding me?” I said. He replied, “I don’t want her older sister to get mad at me for trying to give her younger sister the same ring.” Really? Only from the Appalachian foothills of Ohio. — Told anonymously to INSTORE’s Big Survey, 2016


This article originally appeared in the September 2017 edition of INSTORE.

Over the years, INSTORE has won 76 international journalism awards for its publication and website. Contact INSTORE's editors at editor@instoremag.com.

True Tales

“Even If You Were Cher, I Wouldn’t Loan You This Jewelry!”

An owner refuses to fall for this dumb yet real scam artist.

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ONE DAY, a limo pulled into my parking lot. The young lady who alit claimed to be the P.A. for Cher. She went on to pick out pieces from my case that she swore would work in that night’s performance and be returned the next day. I informed her if the star herself walked in, I wouldn’t hand over thousands of dollars worth of jewelry “on loan.” She called me some nasty names and left. Seems Cher was not performing anywhere near the East Coast that night and it was just a scam. Oh well! — James Doggett, Doggett Jewelry, Kingston, NH

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True Tales

You Won’t Believe Why This Customer Returned a Ring

He had really high standards.

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A MALE CUSTOMER ordered a $4,000 platinum band, which shortly arrived from Germany. He holds it up and puts it on; it fits perfectly. Then he peers intently inside the ring. “The third hallmark is a fraction out of line,” he says. We send it back to Germany and it duly arrives with the hallmark totally lined up. The customer comes in and says that he doesn’t want this ring as it’s like buying a Mercedes and the salesman dings the wing: he repairs it, but would you want a damaged Mercedes? Left me speechless. The customer still has a credit three years later. — Gordon Lawrie, Eidos, Santa Fe, NM

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True Tales

This Jeweler Had to Get Innovative with a Penis Ring

In emergencies, release latch.

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A lady came to get a ring for her boyfriend’s penis. We suggested that it would not be a good idea to get one that does not open as that could end up being dangerous. We had to get an arthritic shank from Stuller and make one that opens and closes like a mini baby bangle. Gene Arthur, Arthur’s Jewelry, Reidsville, NC 

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