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Strokes of Genius

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Jewelry has a long history of great ideas. For a current trendy example, take the diamond line bracelet. Other ideas, however, have not been so widely welcomed. Let’s take a look at some jewelry concepts that have succeeded and some others that, well, wouldn’t.

GREAT IDEAS

?Something Blue?  
Tennis Bracelets  
Tolkowsky’s Ideal Cut Diamonds  
The Velvet Jewelry Box  
?Spend Two Months Salary?  
Hearts and Arrows  
The Sweet Sixteen Pearl Necklace  
Cognac Diamonds  
Chokers  
College Fraternity Rings  
Jewelry Store  

NOT-SO GREAT IDEAS

?Something Blew? 
Wrestling Bracelets 
Big Jim’s Sloppy Cut Diamonds 
The Ziploc Jewelry Baggie 
?Give Us Your First-born? 
Hammers and Sickles 
The Midlife Crisis Diamond Cufflink 
?Ripple? Diamonds 
Choking 
Jailhouse Posse Nipple Rings 
JewelryStore.com 

THE END ZONE

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when harry met sally (reprise)

This time around, we offer you a jewelry advertising campaign that we’d love to see: 

TV AD: THE SCREAMER
(Open on a nice restaurant, where a nervous man sits across from an excitable young woman. They have finished their dinner and are having a conversation. There’s an awkward silence.) 

MAN: Sally, there’s something I want to ask you … 
(Knowing what’s coming, she lets out a small squeak of excitement.) 

WOMAN: Oh! 

MAN: Well, we’ve been together for two years now … and … ummm … 

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(Another, louder squeal from her as the question approaches.) 

WOMAN: Ooh! 

MAN: Well, I was thinking … you know … 

(An even louder squeal.) 

WOMAN: OOH! 

(The man is so nervous he rushes the next line.) 

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MAN: Well, you know I was thinking maybe you and I and … umm … and well, I was thinking … Katherine, will you marry me? 

(As he finishes he pulls out an oversize ring box. The woman squeals again, louder than ever.) 

WOMAN: AAAAH! 

(The man opens the box to reveal a very undersized diamond ring. Cut to the woman’s horrified face.) 

WOMAN: AAAAAAARGHHHHH! 

(Cut to the man: looking terribly mortified as he realizes his diamond is too small. Cut to title card.) 

Title: Who says size doesn’t matter? The diamond company recommends spending at least two months … no wait … make that three month’s salary. Or more. Yes. More. 

Title: Visit your local diamond retailer today, and learn to how to select a diamond that will make her scream with joy, not disappointment. 

(Cut to the restaurant. The man sobs quietly in his soup, the woman still screams.) 

FADE TO BLACK.

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SPONSORED VIDEO

It’s Going to Set Us Up Very Nicely for Retirement

You’ve worked hard all your life. And if you’re like most jewelers contemplating retirement, you’re hoping that your going-out-of-business sale will add to your nest egg — with minimal complications. That’s exactly what Doug and Jacki Friedrich, fourth-generation owners of Friedrich Jewelers Inc., of Vernon, Conn., experienced when they selected Wilkerson to run their sale. “Jewelers who are contemplating a sale should go with Wilkerson because of their experience,” says Doug. And with financial goals “exceeding expectations,” the couple can now focus on enjoying the next chapter of their lives. “It’s going to set us up very nicely for retirement,” says Jacki. “The money’s coming in and we have no complaints. It’s been wonderful.”

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In the End

Strokes of Genius

Published

on

Jewelry has a long history of great ideas. For a current trendy example, take the diamond line bracelet. Other ideas, however, have not been so widely welcomed. Let’s take a look at some jewelry concepts that have succeeded and some others that, well, wouldn’t.

GREAT IDEAS

?Something Blue?  
Tennis Bracelets  
Tolkowsky’s Ideal Cut Diamonds  
The Velvet Jewelry Box  
?Spend Two Months Salary?  
Hearts and Arrows  
The Sweet Sixteen Pearl Necklace  
Cognac Diamonds  
Chokers  
College Fraternity Rings  
Jewelry Store  

NOT-SO GREAT IDEAS

?Something Blew? 
Wrestling Bracelets 
Big Jim’s Sloppy Cut Diamonds 
The Ziploc Jewelry Baggie 
?Give Us Your First-born? 
Hammers and Sickles 
The Midlife Crisis Diamond Cufflink 
?Ripple? Diamonds 
Choking 
Jailhouse Posse Nipple Rings 
JewelryStore.com 

Advertisement

THE END ZONE

when harry met sally (reprise)

This time around, we offer you a jewelry advertising campaign that we’d love to see: 

TV AD: THE SCREAMER
(Open on a nice restaurant, where a nervous man sits across from an excitable young woman. They have finished their dinner and are having a conversation. There’s an awkward silence.) 

MAN: Sally, there’s something I want to ask you … 
(Knowing what’s coming, she lets out a small squeak of excitement.) 

WOMAN: Oh! 

Advertisement

MAN: Well, we’ve been together for two years now … and … ummm … 

(Another, louder squeal from her as the question approaches.) 

WOMAN: Ooh! 

MAN: Well, I was thinking … you know … 

(An even louder squeal.) 

WOMAN: OOH! 

Advertisement

(The man is so nervous he rushes the next line.) 

MAN: Well, you know I was thinking maybe you and I and … umm … and well, I was thinking … Katherine, will you marry me? 

(As he finishes he pulls out an oversize ring box. The woman squeals again, louder than ever.) 

WOMAN: AAAAH! 

(The man opens the box to reveal a very undersized diamond ring. Cut to the woman’s horrified face.) 

WOMAN: AAAAAAARGHHHHH! 

(Cut to the man: looking terribly mortified as he realizes his diamond is too small. Cut to title card.) 

Title: Who says size doesn’t matter? The diamond company recommends spending at least two months … no wait … make that three month’s salary. Or more. Yes. More. 

Title: Visit your local diamond retailer today, and learn to how to select a diamond that will make her scream with joy, not disappointment. 

(Cut to the restaurant. The man sobs quietly in his soup, the woman still screams.) 

FADE TO BLACK.

Advertisement

SPONSORED VIDEO

It’s Going to Set Us Up Very Nicely for Retirement

You’ve worked hard all your life. And if you’re like most jewelers contemplating retirement, you’re hoping that your going-out-of-business sale will add to your nest egg — with minimal complications. That’s exactly what Doug and Jacki Friedrich, fourth-generation owners of Friedrich Jewelers Inc., of Vernon, Conn., experienced when they selected Wilkerson to run their sale. “Jewelers who are contemplating a sale should go with Wilkerson because of their experience,” says Doug. And with financial goals “exceeding expectations,” the couple can now focus on enjoying the next chapter of their lives. “It’s going to set us up very nicely for retirement,” says Jacki. “The money’s coming in and we have no complaints. It’s been wonderful.”

Promoted Headlines

Most Popular