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True Tales

The Old Man Who Could Not Escape Our Bathroom

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An aged gentleman comes into our store to pick up a job. He asks to use our bathroom. After an extended period of time, I am getting concerned about whether he has “fallen in” or passed out in there. A couple minutes later, I hear a faint knocking from within. Then the phone rings and it’s this guy calling, telling me he cannot get out of the bathroom. I run over to the door and yell, “Just pull down on the door handle.”  He replies, “I have been trying, but it won’t open.” My next step is to get a safety pin to unlock the door when all of a sudden he opens the door and walks out. I apologize about the difficulty he had getting out of the bathroom, only to find out he had been struggling with the locked janitor’s closet on the other side of the sink. I pray that he can find his way home. — Told anonymously to INSTORE’s Big Survey, 2016


This article originally appeared in the June 2017 edition of INSTORE.

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True Tales

You Won’t Believe Why This Customer Returned a Ring

He had really high standards.

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A male customer ordered a $4,000 platinum band, which shortly arrived from Germany. He holds it up and puts it on; it fits perfectly. Then he peers intently inside the ring. “The third hallmark is a fraction out of line,” he says. We send it back to Germany and it duly arrives with the hallmark totally lined up. The customer comes in and says that he doesn’t want this ring as it’s like buying a Mercedes and the salesman dings the wing: he repairs it, but would you want a damaged Mercedes? Left me speechless. The customer still has a credit three years later. — Gordon Lawrie, Eidos, Santa Fe, NM<.

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True Tales

This Jeweler Had to Get Innovative with a Penis Ring

In emergencies, release latch.

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A lady came to get a ring for her boyfriend’s penis. We suggested that it would not be a good idea to get one that does not open as that could end up being dangerous. We had to get an arthritic shank from Stuller and make one that opens and closes like a mini baby bangle. Gene Arthur, Arthur’s Jewelry, Reidsville, NC 

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True Tales

Funny But True: You Can’t Make These Surprising Stories Up

The joy of surprises…

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Customer was in the store buying his wife a surprise anniversary gift when his phone rang and we overheard him explaining that he was someplace else. His wife walks in to pick up her surprise gift to him while still on the phone with him. Ended up nicely, but the surprise gifts were no longer a surprise!

Customer came in on Friday to pick up a $60,000 ring we created. The next day, his girlfriend came by to scream at us for not having finished the ring. We just had to take it.

Provided anonymously to INSTORE’s 2016 Big Survey

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