Larry is the most experienced jeweler at Arney Guess Goldsmith. His wealth of knowledge and experience is unmatched. Whenever we had problems, he would fix them with a smile. Whenever we needed help, he was always generous and kind. He also had the unenviable task of doing the most stressful jobs. I don’t know how he did it, he was always so cool under pressure. Larry, we love you, man!

We have all heard of the opera singers who can crack a champagne glass, but only the legendary opera singers can make an old ring look like new.

Being a jeweler is a lifestyle, it’s a way of thinking and viewing the world, and when it comes to love, what better way to solder two hearts together than with polished conversation.

There are couple of settings that you swear must have been invented to torture jewelers — tension settings are another evil spawn of Satan.

Cruises, need I say more? Sometimes you just want to play along and let them live in ignorant bliss.

I think dragons would make great jewelers. They have great vision, so they don’t need loupes. They can breathe fire, so they don’t need torches, and casting is a cinch. Plus, I hear they have an artistic eye and natural gift for design. And he’s so cute — who could say no to him?

Yes, this is me. Every time I see jewelry in the movies, including gold props, I can’t help myself. I have to blurt it out and let everyone know how fake the jewels are.

The mysteries of the universe are locked in this phenomenon. I am convinced that the secrets to quantum mechanics are found in those pesky gemstones that seem to vanish into a parallel universe. Where do they go? We will never know.

I remember the first time I saw someone stick their entire finger into their mouth, and then proceeded to pull that saliva-drenched ring off their finger, and try to hand it to me. YUCK! Why?! Why?!

You know it’s vacation season when these customers show up. I didn’t finish the character’s conversation because every jeweler knows how this ends — with some unique, bargain- priced rare gemstone they bought. Also, extra jeweler points if you noticed the bent prongs.

The invisible setting looks great, I admit it. But setting it, cleaning it, and even touching it, is terrifying and frustrating.

I have had diamonds leap out and vanish into thin air exactly like this cartoon. Poof. Gone without a trace. How does that happen?! And why is it that it’s never junky stones? It’s maddening!

I love looking at the world through a jeweler’s eyes, because, let’s face it, jewelers see the world in a completely different way. And you have to admit, a cake cut this way would be more appealing. I mean it is a jewelers job to make bland things brilliant.

I love action figures. I think this would be a great one. Not sure the kids would like it though, doesn’t have enough muscles.

Oh man, the smell of old crusty jewelry. That is a smell only a jeweler would know. It should be bottled up and used for chemical warfare.

I think loupes are a funny thing. I love loupes, every jeweler has their favorite pair and their favorite style. It’s funny how the young jewelers don’t wear loupes but the older you get the more magnification gets added, until you need loupes to read everything.

I love pizza and one day my crazy brain noticed this remarkable similarity. It could explain why I get hungry every time I see a diamond …

This is the kind of love poem I would write for my wife and she would just stare at it with a confused smile and say, “Thanks?”

Why do customers do this? Why? Why? Why?! I still remember the first time someone did this and handed me the wet ring. This was immediately followed by, “I haven’t taken this ring off in 20 years.” I can tell. By the SMELL!